CRANKY MONDAY..........

I need to change this haha, - but I need to start looking for a way to love Mondays :-)

Day of optimism for the week ahead perhaps?  Ideally should feel rested??? 

In all honesty I tend to loathe Mondays, - am at least glad when the work component is over
I often luckily sleep soundly on Friday and Saturday nights, (and most others) but Sundays, - not quite so much.  Reckon I was lucky to get 2.5 hours sleep infact last night.

I was feeling a little disappointed in myself for having some sparkling wine last night, kept analysing my decision not to wait till Friday.  I would have had a bit over half a bottle between 4.30pm and 7pm, didn't feel drunk or anything.  I didn't binge or anything.  I had completed the 29 day challenge, was pleased with that.  Anyhow I had come to realise that unless I make a firm decision NOT to have any wine.........I can easily act on an urge.  I remained 'undecided' about yesterday but thought 'probably best if I can hang out till next Friday' haha!

Work was a struggle, we were all clumsy, I have now just under 6 weeks yet till I resign, (not long, but still a good while!)  Just felt fatigued and as if I couldn't be arsed, - yet had to work really fast and be quite productive all day.  I was glad to see the end of the work day!

I was DREADING training today as the last few weeks I have been pushing myself on a Monday, and thought I'd be lucky if I can manage a 'half' effort.  I had binge 'urges', - my animal brain couldn't decide what it wanted to 'devour', - cheese, various cakes, iced coffee, iced chocolate, chocolate etc.  I knew I DIDN'T WANT to give into any urges, just told myself  'they will pass',- they did.

Lunch was delicious.  I had a crusty multigrain warm baguette with middle dough removed, then scrape dijon mustard, full salad, about 120g plain tuna in springwater, cracked pepper and lemon juice.  That is similar to my lunches most days.  These baguettes are quite long, (not far off 30cm) but they are skinny and are one of the highlights of my workday!    I enjoyed eating it so much, - I just wanted to eat it again when I finished, and then hoe into my sugarfree carrot 'cake' which was part of another 'meal', (with small skinny flat white) later that day.  But I drank water, didn't give in.  Most days for brekkie of late I have a heaped 1/3 C oats, (or slightly scant half cup) microwaved with water and about 100g frozen berries, then stir either chocolate or vanilla protein powder and psyllium husks through it, - so good!   I stayed within my normal control and didn't binge or overindulge, - good!  Today was a challenge though!

However: - I blew off the gym today.  Good to catch up with my housemate though.  Best get to bed early to make sure I get an early night for some killer workouts the next few days!  I have made a firm decision not to drink any alcohol till at least Friday.  I bought some wine in the Swan Valley yesterday but it remains out of the fridge.

Tomoz after work I am getting a free metabolism test.  Will find out weight, lean mass, water percentage, metabolic age, fat around organs and targets when I 'can' work towards.  I am sure tomorrows results will be better than those 4-6 weeks ago (if I had them then) and I also reckon they will still leave alot of room to improve.  One major point of interest is if my lean mass has increased at all from 4 years ago, (or decreased).  I know I am stronger, can lift a bit heavier than back then.  Then it's off to the gym for workout with my mate.

I rang up agent about Thailand trip.  The thing is back in Feb I booked a 16 day Kumuka tour of Thailand.  However a couple of months ago Kumuka worldwide has gone into liquidation.  I had paid for tour, flights, travel insurance.  I have had to go and fill out forms which I returned to the travel agent and they go toward getting me a refund for the cancelled Kumuka tour.  Meanwhile I found another tour through G Adventures which is of similar length and fits in with my pre-booked flights.  I so want to book my spot before it gets booked out, - this G Adventures tour sounds even better than the original Kumuka one!  BUT getting a refund from Kumuka is proving a nightmare, the travel agent is not getting any sense out of them at the moment.  I'm worried they may not pay me back.  Agent is reluctant to book G Adventures tour till I get refunded from Kumuka.  My dates for Thailand now stand at leaving 19 Oct, returning 6 Nov.

Either way I need to stay focussed, want to continue to get a bit fitter all round, lean up somewhat and drop a few more kg by then and stay in control.

That's about it for Monday gossip, at least Monday is outta the way for this week :-)